diff options
Diffstat (limited to 'src/md/08_Win_Friends_and_Influence_People.md')
| -rw-r--r-- | src/md/08_Win_Friends_and_Influence_People.md | 82 |
1 files changed, 0 insertions, 82 deletions
diff --git a/src/md/08_Win_Friends_and_Influence_People.md b/src/md/08_Win_Friends_and_Influence_People.md deleted file mode 100644 index 5831e71..0000000 --- a/src/md/08_Win_Friends_and_Influence_People.md +++ /dev/null @@ -1,82 +0,0 @@ ---- -title: Win Friends and Influence People ---- - -_Mom had a special knack for teaching without using undue drama. The -following story illustrates her typical style._ - -Tom and I had been driving tractors and motorcycles for quite a while -when we decided it was high time we had a real "classy ride". Neither of -us had a driver's license yet, but that was no obstacle to our plan. My -16th birthday was coming up and I would be able to drive our car by -myself soon enough. So we hatched a plan to go together and buy a car. -We started looking at the ads in the newspaper and before long we found -our dream car. It was a 1962 Ford Falcon, almost exactly like the -picture below. - -{width="5.935124671916011in" -height="3.71875in" alt=""} - -We told dad this was precisely what we wanted and asked him to take us -to see the car. The three of us went to the house of the seller, who -turned out to be an old gentleman with a heavy Swedish accent. He showed -us the car and let us get inside and look under the hood and kick the -tires. It was in very good shape, so Tom and I could hardly contain our -excitement over buying this "classy ride". The asking price was $350. -We had the money between us and were ready to put our money on the table -and call it a deal. - -However, dad had other ideas. He asked the kindly old Swedish man if we -could come inside and discuss the deal. Now I started to get nervous. In -my mind, there was nothing to discuss. Just give the nice man his money -and let's be on our way. But my dad felt there is always some benefit in -trying to sweeten the deal when you are buying a used car. The old man -invited us in and I nervously hoped that dad wouldn't destroy our dreams -by trying to save a few dollars. - -When we were seated in the living room, dad said, "Would you be willing -to take \$325 for the car?" The old man said, "I vill tink about it. -Joost a moment." He got up and left the room to discuss our offer with -his wife. I was holding my breath and crossing my fingers when the old -man returned and said, "Dat vill be alright, ya." I sighed a big sigh of -relief as we left with the understanding that dad would return with the -cash the next day. - -I could only drive the car with a parent present for a few months, but -Tom and I were ecstatic that we were the owners of a car. I wanted to -make it look as good as possible, so I decided to wash and wax the car -to make it look nearly new. I thought it would be a good idea to solicit -some help in this ambitious plan, so I convinced Tom, Kristie and Leslie -to help. Now I didn't know much about this art, but I had a vision of -what the car should look like when we were finished. Washing the car -wasn't terribly complex and we managed to do this quickly. However, -waxing was a different story. I gave each helper a cloth and assigned -each person a part of the car to rub the wax on. I didn't know enough to -give each worker any instructions on how to get complete coverage of wax -on the surface of the car. Consequently, the shine looked patchy and -poor. It definitely didn't match my vision of a gleaming new car and I -verbally told my helpers how poorly they were doing. - -Ultimately, my volunteers got tired of my less-than-inspiring feedback -on the job they were doing and said something on the order of, "OK, Mr. -Know-it-all! You can just do it yourself!" and walked off the job. I -suppose they went back in the house and told Mom how abusive I was as a -car-waxing supervisor. Shortly afterward, she came out to find me rather -glumly sitting on the washing bucket, a bit mad about how different the -reality was from the result I had envisioned. She didn't give me a hard -time about my poor treatment of my brother and sisters. She just said, -"Have you ever heard of a book called How to Win Friends and Influence -People?" It was one of my dad's favorite books by Andrew Carnegie and I -knew he had a copy of it in the house somewhere. From this question, I -understood that Mom was implying I could benefit from working on my -people skills a bit. She always had a special knack to help me see my -faults without resorting to scolding or raising her voice. - -This was the pattern in our home. I can't remember my mother ever -raising her voice at me or at any of the children. We learned from this -approach to handling conflicts that anger and yelling simply were not -appropriate. How grateful I am for this invaluable example. I always did -my best to follow this example when communicating with my own family -when I became a parent myself. The result of my mother's simple example -will bless many generations with the knowledge that the soft-spoken -approach gets better results than yelling and screaming every time. |